人过五十,已知天命

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人过五十,已知天命

孔子说:“三十而立,四十而不惑,五十知天命。”

人过五十,人生下半场就真正开始了,也没有什么好迷惑的。该来的会来,该走的会走;该有的有了,该没有的还是没有。

一切顺其自然,才是最好的活法。很多事情,经历过了,也就懂了;即便没有懂得,也不想去弄清答案了,难得糊涂,也是一种结局。

01

争来争去,人永远争不过天。

“万般皆是命,半点不由人”,当你拼命去争的时候,你会发现自己越来越累,但是你想要的东西,不一定可以得到。

比方说,大城市里的房子,你总是想着,一直追求着。但是你奋斗了那么多年,还是在小城里生活,你根本就没有能力去大城市里安家。或许,你连小城市里的房子,也买不起,只能在乡村建两间平房。

学会认命,一个人才会好命。把注定争不来的东西,都放下,不要去争了。往后余生,不吵不闹不争,退一步,海阔天空。

做人,学会不争,才会活得更好。放弃了遥远的梦,就能够慢慢去实现眼前的目标;不再去大城市里混,在小城里也会混得风生水起,心情也会更快乐;不奢望自己大富大贵,就能够真正体会到自己这辈子很不容易。

做人,要有不屈不挠的精神,还要有“退而求其次”的洒脱。前进是为了更好的生活,后退也是。聪明的人,总是进退自如,不会固定自己的人生模式,把不完美的一生,当成完美。心圆满了,人生就圆满了。

02

忙来忙去,多半是瞎忙。

朋友大志说:“在单位忙了十多年,没有想到,最后的结局,会那么糟糕。”大志在一家公司的业务骨干,他每天都在和客户打交道,白天陪客户,晚上写合约,做方案,工作忙得团团转。上司对他很器重,也常常表扬他。

上个月,大志大病一场,起源就是因为常常熬夜,导致身体垮了。大志才五十二岁啊,他的下半生,该如何度过?一个人,失去了健康,就失去了一切,所有的努力,都功亏一篑。大志住院的时候,精神状态很差,我也不知道如何安慰他,但我真心祈祷,愿他健健康康活下去,以后再也不要那么忙了。

我们总以为,忙碌是治愈一切的良药,只要忙碌起来,总会赚到钱,总会忘记很多烦恼。可是,日日夜夜都在忙,一个人就没有了休息时间,身体受不了。

最糟糕的是,有的人,忙忙碌碌的时候,是毫无头绪的,像无头的苍蝇一样,乱撞。忙了很多年,发现自己一无所获,身体也垮了,真的是得不偿失。

以后的日子,你要活得有目标,要慢慢过。走得慢,才能走得远;走得慢,才能看到身边的风景。

人过五十,已知天命

03

绕来绕去,慢慢就回到了原点。

很多人,一个劲地往前赶,但是走了很远的路,才发现,自己还是在原地,或者绕了很长一段路,回到了原点。人生就像走迷宫一样,真的说不清自己可以走到哪里。

聪明的人,总是走得很慢,会看清楚自己的位置。比方说,你想要去山顶看日出,你就好好计划自己的时间,几点起床,几点爬山,几点到达山顶,你也会准确判断日出的时间。如果你没有计划好行程,你就会匆匆忙忙赶路,还有可能迷路,走冤枉路。

有的人,拼搏了很多年,以为自己得到了很多,可是回头一看,发现自己还是一无所获。并不是所有的努力,都会有结果,但所有的努力,都会让你感觉到“问心无愧”。或许,通过努力,让自己的心情变得更好,活成了自己,就是最好的回报。

人生,其实是注定要回到原点的。古人说:“落叶归根。”也就是告诉我们,人生走多远,最后还是会很想念自己出生的地方,因为自己的根就在那里。人生啊,结束就是新的开始,开始就是另一种结束。冥冥之中,每个人都会回到原点。

04

爱来爱去,还是身边的人最好。

五十岁之前,你会觉得家庭不够幸福,因为你的生活压力很大,身边的人也不懂你,还常常埋怨你。人到中年,如果遇到一个懂自己的人,那该多好。

当你经历了婚外的爱情之后,你忽然发现,自己并没有找到真爱,婚外的爱情,多半是虚无缥缈的。还可能是遇到了一个有拜金主义思想的人,别人只是爱你的钱,一旦得到了钱,就马上离开你。

还有过去的爱而不得的人,你天天思念到心痛,但是一点用处都没有。当你再见那个人的时候,你会发现,他早就忘记了你,你所有的思念,都是一厢情愿的。

人过五十,好好珍惜身边的人,少年夫妻老来伴,以后的日子,身边有个人陪,才会安度晚年。千万别在五十岁的年纪,弄丢了家庭。

人过五十,已知天命

05

说来说去,最好是保持沉默。

以前,和别人聊天,总是知无不言,言无不尽。你以为,自己说了真话,就是帮助别人,就在体现自己很真诚。随着年纪的增长,你越来越发现,言多必失,说多了,反而变成了“口无遮拦”的人,别人不会真正理解你的“良苦用心”。

当你越来越沉默的时候,你就懂得了人生,也远离了祸端。比方说,在一群人聚会的时候,你表扬了某个人,从另一种角度看,你就是贬低了其他的人;你指出了某个人的缺点,就是没有给别人面子。只有保持沉默,当一个旁观者,你反而能够做到左右逢源。

五十岁的人,也是年过半百的人了,以后还是别乱说话,有空的时候,多读书,多思考,多关心自己。别人的事情,你就睁一只眼闭一只眼,看到了也不要去说。

06

想来想去,总要学会放下。

以前,你有胡思乱想的毛病,夜里也常常睡不着,想得天花乱坠。你想什么?有用吗?你想的一切,都是在增加烦恼,都是把过去的“陈谷子,烂芝麻”往脑海里装。

当你一大早起来,感觉头晕,感觉睡眠不足,就是因为你想多了,抱住烦恼不放手。五十岁的人,要让过去的过去,让将来的将来,活好当下,才是最好的生活。

放下,不是说逼着自己去忘记,而是把记忆珍藏起来,哪怕是回想起来,也不会耿耿于怀,内心里,云淡风轻。有些烦恼的事情,就是别人在你面前提起了,你可以是一种满不在乎的样子,一笑而过。

放下,不是放下一切,而是放下烦恼,把美好放在心中,以后的日子,带着美好上路,一路阳光灿烂,一生温暖如春。

五十岁的人,从今往后,守住健康,看淡金钱,别瞎想,别乱说,珍惜自己的家庭,给心灵放个长假......

五十岁的人,越活越明白,用淡淡的心情,过淡淡的日子,享淡淡的福气。

- THE END -
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10月22日15:56

最后修改:2020年10月22日
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